A Circular Journey to Balance and Wholeness

My spirituality is marked by an ongoing effort to be balanced.  I’ve tried to grow in healthy ways, part of a journey of self-improvement. I’ve found peace in being more wholistic, less compartmentalized and more centered. The best image of that for me is the circle, a powerful ancient symbol for many cultures that speaks to me. It’s the way I often think about my journey towards balance and wholeness.

 My spiritual journey has been more of a circle than a path. As I wander and explore, go forward and regress, I don’t move in a straight line. There’s room in a circle to move around the edges or to go inward and then back out. It’s ultimately a journey to the center, where God dwells. Like a labyrinth, my meandering steps bring me closer to God, who in turn sends me back out to others. 

 Life in community has been a breeding ground of growth for me. I have become more humble and patient, more compassionate and caring. I liked who I was becoming! This development is like tree rings. As experience builds upon experience, it yields wisdom, encompassing all of my past. As I continued to discern my vocation, I was strongly encouraged by this personal growth. I saw myself becoming the best version of myself, who God was calling me to be. This still encourages me that I’m where I’m meant to be.

 I used to think that to be balanced I needed to take one aspect of my life at a time. Attend to one, then another, consecutively. I used to put a lot of energy into focusing on them separately.  I even considered the amount of time I spent on each. I also saw it as a series of choices, as though there was limited room in my life. I thought if I was one thing, I couldn’t be another. An example of this is when I entered novitiate. I had a narrow definition of my identity, seeing myself as an intellectual, which seemed to leave out other abilities or personality traits, like doing menial tasks or being domestic.

 Later in formation, when I desired both solitude and community, I felt tension between them. They seemed to pull at me from opposite directions. At times, it felt like I had to choose one, yet I felt drawn to both. But after some time living in community, I realized I could honor both. There are many paradoxes in life, key aspects that seem to contradict but are equally valid. I achieve balance when I can live it as an AND, not an OR. Disparate parts of our lives aren’t that different and often aren’t actually separate; they can overlap in harmony.

I realized that it’s not a choice between introverted reflection or community life; it’s about finding the rhythm to have both. That rhythm involves going inside myself and then moving out toward others, a spiral motion where I find the energy and clarity to connect with others.  My quest for balance and my appreciation for the complexities of life have helped me see how interwoven aspects of my life are.

It's also clear how much of a blessing that is. I experience that most in my relationships. No wonder, because we’re already connected through a common spiritual father, God. Seeing those connections is always a powerful experience. One of them happened when I was a teenager in my parish youth group. We ended retreats with an affirmation activity, identifying how we saw God in each other sitting in a circle. Each shared this as we threw a ball of yarn, holding onto the end of yarn until it formed a web, a symbol that we were brothers and sisters in Christ. Our connection in Christ was true grace.

Balance helps me to be healthy in a world that is complicated and even dysfunctional. People are complex and so are the relationships and situations I find myself in. I try to find beauty in the realities of being human and to love people as they are. I also seek to engage in a positive, balanced way, contributing that to the situation while remaining healthy myself.

Keeping that balance requires discernment. When I focus on the present, responding to where God is in the moment, I connect to others on a deeper level and can recognize others’ needs better. Through relationships, I can be more authentic, too. The Holy Spirit guides my steps.

It helps me to keep my roots in God and Gospel values, prioritizing what really matters and putting my energy into that gives life purpose and meaning. My relationship with God is important to me and I maintain it through prayer. My values and priorities make choices clearer and efforts are unified in a common direction. Direction encompasses a lot of decisions. For example, once I valued our life together as sisters and was committed to it, I naturally sought it out. There was less tension involved.

This is the simplicity of the value-driven life. St. Francis’ example inspires me in this. He was wholehearted in his love for Jesus and it showed in how he lived. I was a Secular Franciscan before I was a religious sister, and part of our constitution particularly resonated with me. St. Francis prescribes moving from Gospel to life and then from life to the Gospel, bringing that wisdom to our lives and viewing life’s circumstances through that Scripture. It’s a clear path and a direction of the heart, simple and profound.

Simplicity is like a circle.  It has no beginning or end, no quadrants or corners; it’s a whole without fractions. It doesn’t make sense to compartmentalize anymore. I feel invited to embrace the parts of my life in a wholistic way, to bring them all together, united and complete. My “J” brain still resists this at times, but there’s so much wisdom in living this way. I’ve been on a slow journey from knowledge and being in my head to being spiritually wise. When I stopped trying to sort my life into like colors and patterns, as though I’m creating an ordered mandala, something natural and equally beautiful was created. It has its own symmetry. I’ve gone from focusing on the parts to seeing them together.

                 Spiritual growth comes from God, who is the source of life, much like the sun. There’s an abundance of beauty and goodness in this world, in nature and the hearts of God’s children.  I want to seek out energy and inspiration through places, people, and activities that light me up. I can do that through hobbies and interests and trying new things. I can find parts of the mundane or unpleasant that are more positive and bring positive energy to those aspects of my life. There’s always hope.

                Seeking balance and wholeness has been a key feature to my spiritual journey. My progress has been circular, both in movement and spirit. Circle imagery reminds me of my journey and inspires me to grow in simplicity, wisdom, and connection to others.

The Felicians go to the Eucharistic Congress

 An enthusiastic group of Felician Sisters participated in the Eucharistic Congress in Indianapolis, Indiana from July 17-21.           

The events of the Congress took place in Lucas Oil Stadium, Indiana Convention Center, and surrounding buildings. 

Nearby St. John the Evangelist Church served as the Adoration chapel for the weekend. It was often so packed with adorers that it was standing room only! After the Congress ended, a mural about the Eucharist will be installed there. During the Congress, it was on display in the Exhibit Hall.

The Congress was a revival and ongoing movement. It was an experience of the universal Church that was both a conference and a pilgrimage. More than 60,000 Catholics and their friends came from near and far to adore the Eucharistic Lord.

The special intercessor of the National Eucharistic Congress was Blessed Carlo Acutis, an Italian website designer whose devotion to the Eucharist inspired him to document Eucharistic miracles using his computer skills. His relics, along with artwork featuring him, were available to be venerated and admired.

Four groups walked to Indianapolis on pilgrimage from the four corners of the United States. At the beginning of the first night, each group presented a framed picture of the patron saint of the area they came from. Those pictures were placed in the middle of the stadium floor level for the Congress.

      

Each evening, the entire group gathered for the Revival sessions, a combination of Adoration, speakers, and music that inspired and challenged them. Adoration was a critical part of the Congress. There was Exposition of the Blessed Sacrament each evening. The Eucharistic Congress started with it, there was a procession, and it ended with the Eucharist itself, at the closing Mass. A common theme for the Congress was the Road to Emmaus. Several speakers encouraged the pilgrims to see Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament with eyes of faith and with their hearts.

 

 

A variety of Masses were available daily at different times and in a variety of languages and rites. The chalices and monstrance used at the Congress were blessed by Pope Francis. He extended his blessing other ways, too. The papal nuncio to America spoke the first night and the cardinal who presided over the closing Mass read a letter from Pope Francis.

One recurring theme of the Congregation was repentance. Several speakers quoted from the second chapter of Revelation: “I know your works, your toil and your patient endurance. I know that you cannot tolerate evildoers... But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first.” The people were exhorted to revive their hearts from apathy, since repentance is the road to love. It’s not possible to turn to God fully or to give wholeheartedly without it. Many people took advantage of the opportunity to receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation there.

There were exhibits to experience, including an Exhibit Hall where the Felician Sisters had a booth. The sisters represented the community and promoted vocations, talking to fellow pilgrims and offering Felician giveaways. The sisters who weren’t working shifts at the booth visited it, stopping by to talk to the other sisters and those who came to the booth.

Most of the sisters who weren’t working at the booth were part of the Baltimore group. They were guests of Bishop Bruce Lewandowski, a bishop of that diocese and brother of Sister Mary Francis Lewandowski. As honorary Baltimorians, the sisters had transportation to and from the convention center each day.

Participants attended sessions they chose based on their interests and needs. The presenters and performers heard throughout the weekend were a Catholic Who’s Who of well-known speakers, writers, and singers from YouTube, apps, and the publishing world. They encouraged, inspired, and challenged their audience. The crowd was especially excited to see Jonathan Roumie, who portrays Jesus in the television series The Chosen. Roumie spoke humbly and devoutly about the Eucharist. He had come right after filming the Last Supper scenes for the program and gave a dramatic reading of the Eucharistic prayer of Jesus in the Gospel according to St. John.

Additional pilgrims came for the Eucharistic Procession. 70,000 adorers joined the Procession in downtown Indianapolis. People lined the streets while the line passed, waving and cheering, going down on their knees when the monstrance was near. The procession was led by children who recently received Communion, dressed in their First Communion suits and dresses. They were followed by members of lay ecclesial movements, religious sisters and brothers, priests, and bishops. They walked to a park where they prayed the Divine Mercy Chaplet and spent time in Adoration.

 

 

Throughout the weekend, they played Walk with One videos, which focused on the importance of reaching out to those we know as a way of evangelizing. There’s a program to keep that initiative going post-Congress. At closing Mass, everyone was sent as Eucharistic Missionaries, which starts the Year of Mission. The movement continues! The next Eucharistic Congress is in 2033, but there will be a Eucharistic Pilgrimage is in the spring of 2025. There may be more to come, too!

The Eucharistic Congress was a powerful experience for all involved. The gifts and graces received by the participants will be felt for a long time. It was a true revival for the Catholic Church that promises to bear much fruit.

Mary of the Annunciation

 

A young woman sits alone in a humble home in a backwater town. Her life is much like her neighbors’. Simple, focused on family and the needs of the day. She saw the light first, shining brighter than the sun, blinding her to her surroundings. Then it cleared, and she saw him. He had the features of a man but such a look of goodness and kindness. Purpose.

The only light left was from the lamp; it looked dim by comparison. She knew this was a messenger of God. Her mind went to the Torah she knew. Any time God sent His messengers, something big was going to happen. Something that changed everything. What could God want from her?

                Then he spoke. “Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you.”

 “Do not be afraid, Mary; you have found favor with God. You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to call him Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David,  and he will reign over Jacob’s descendants forever; his kingdom will never end.”

The words shocked her. She hardly knew what to think or feel. But then, she did: happiness. The “Son of the Most High”? The Messiah was coming! Oh, how they needed it! They were struggling under the Romans. But it was confusing, too. Wasn’t the Messiah coming as a warrior king?  No one thought the Messiah would come as a baby. She didn’t understand that at all! And how could she bear the Messiah, she, who hadn’t lain with Joseph yet? Then she thought of her cousin Elizabeth. It was just as impossible for an old woman to have a baby. Yet she was!

But what about Joseph? Would he believe her? What about her family? Or the people of Nazareth? If they ever knew the baby wasn’t Joseph’s, she’d be in serious danger. Yes, she was afraid, too.

“How will this be,” Mary asked the angel, “since I am a virgin?”

                The angel answered, “The Holy Spirit will come on you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God. Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be unable to conceive is in her sixth month. For no word from God will ever fail.”

She had always known that she wanted to be a mother. She felt such love within her, such an ability to care and help. To raise children to walk with the Lord. To be that loving mother they would always come to.

The news about Elizabeth was amazing! The Lord was truly making miracles happen. For years, she had wanted a child, feeling ashamed and sad. How often had she talked to Mary about it, as tears ran down her face?! And now she was six months pregnant! This confirmed to Mary that the Lord’s work had begun. He was making something new, and she got to be a part of it. She wondered how Elizabeth was. How did she feel? Happy to be with child, surely, but what about the circumstances?

And she was, somehow, not surprised. A sense of calm came over her. She had felt for years that God was calling her to Himself, closer to Him and His will. She had always known that there was something different about her. For as long as she could remember, she had been different from the other girls in her village. She only ever wanted to be close to God, to do what was right and good. She believed the truths she learned at the Temple and from her parents, obediently following them. The other girls often didn’t understand her, especially when she wouldn’t join in their gossip or unkind talk. It had never bothered her, though. She was content with her close friends and family, helping her mother at home, learning about God and the Torah. She went to Temple faithfully, lingering there when she could, praying and pondering.

She remembered the Torah readings in Temple, the gentle explanations of her father, praying with her mother before bed. Her own prayer had been growing deeper, not in words but in expectation. The silence with God had become heavy with meaning. Now she was face to face with an angel and that call had words! Maybe this was how Moses and the prophets felt when they were called.

            Now God was calling her forward, and a part of her had been waiting for this moment. She felt afraid but ready at the same time, unsure of how all this would unfold but sure that God would be with her every step along the way. Her life had prepared her for this moment.

Her FIAT came from deep within her. It was a yes to God Himself, to whatever came next. It was yes to a new life. Send me, she prayed, use me. She wanted to be part of His plan, wherever it took her.

She met the angel’s gaze.

“I am the Lord’s servant,” Mary answered. “May your word to me be fulfilled.” Then he left her, disappearing as though he had never been there.

She felt a breeze stir, warming her. She felt it touching her body, like a hand on her arm, both comforting and leading her on. She took a breath, the air felt like life itself. Breathing never felt this way before. She took it in, felt it entering not just her body but her soul, her very self. She wasn’t afraid anymore, or confused, or anything else. She felt love: for God, for her people, for this baby. And loved. She knew wherever this path took her would be blessed.

Second wave of the archive move

 

The movers hard at work!

The storage section is organized by regional area. Art, books, and items that may not be kept are there.

Books in boxes, ready to be gone through.

Books about our foundress, Blessed Mary Angela, are kept together.